Pieces of what if

Right now
Right before
Right everywhere
why?
I did Loved you.
I gave you my all
You were my darling
I adored you
I wanted no other
WHy?
why?
Pain is just not a word
Here Im begging the all mighty to save me
please god
pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaseeeeeeeeeeeee god!!!!!!!!!!!!
im screaming out of my lungs
but the feeling wont go
im crying like a little girl when she is terrified
my tears are not enough
to express
my tormented soul
to forgive myself for loving you so
why did i chose you?
why did i believed in you?
I always knew down inside my guts you were no good
I knew it
but i thought you would of being the one
i thought i could help you
i thought there was hope
i honestly did believe in you
but you betrayed everything i gave you why?
all i did was to love you
shouldn't i have?
I have paid such a price for this love and yet again i got nothing in return but betrayal, lies and more betrayal.
why?
i never ever betray you ! i wanted you only! why? please tell me?
why wasnt I good enough for you ?
wasnt my love good enough?
wasnt my life good enough?
what am i?????????????????????/